Safe And Sound

Today, as I waited for a taxi, outside my own house on my own drive, I felt very open to attack and vulnerable. Now, if you don’t know I suffer with Obsessive Compulsive thinking/mindset and Anxiety problems anyway, so  I am not that social and am somewhat paranoid. However, this doesn’t mean my sense of fear is misplaced while out doors.

Given that where I live is one of the worse places for crime outside of London and having been threatened before with physical attack and hear about attacks and victimisation on a regular basis, I think my over all fear is justified, even if my aforementioned afflictions knock things over the top.

Yes, it is fear, and, frustration with the whole situation. It’s so sad when a misplaced glance at someone can cause an argument, that results in a fight and later a feud where you can get seriously harmed or even killed! Or, if you’re unlucky, all of them at once in the space of five minutes! Hey!… It’s been known to happen!

What the hell do you do when you’re in that situation? Look at it this way, if you walk away (assuming you’re given that choice) then you become a victim, you’re a prime target from then on for them to carry on giving you and your family grief and victimising you in other ways. Not only that, you also become a shining victim for others to give shit to. You lose!

On the other hand if you stand there and have a war of words with these people, even if you use logic to show their problem with you is utterly rubbish and based on nothing but their own low self-esteem, child like attitude and insistence on proving themselves, you run the risk of a fight. In which you could get hurt, arrested by the police for assault (been known to happen), run the risk of further confrontation and even death.

Look what happened to this man; Survived Two tours of Iraq but not a night in Oldham! If I’m not mistaken it also happened to an Army officer who served in Afghanistan Was Killed,  only this time in the North East, however he didn’t survive his encounter. Chris Chackfield was nearly as tall as me and I have no doubt his attacker picked him because of his size. For your information Chackfield’s killer only got Five Years for killing him.

With repercussions like that no wonder people are quick to fly off the handle, rob, fight, assault and rape. So you see, there’s no deterrent to not act like a violent piece of human filth, and anyone who feels wronged by me in some way is free to kick the shit out of me untill I’m dead and then be out in two years. And I just know if I was to do the same to the Human filth on the streets where I live, the real scum who should be locked up for life for what they’ve done, I’d most likely go down for life!

As I said, when you’re in the situation in paragraph four above, what do you do? Obviously the Police can’t be there 24/7, in fact, in some cases Police get their late. By then the attack’s happened, you could be dead and family hurt, they’ll document it then fuck off. The courts’ sentences are not a deterrent to them, so what the hell do you do?

Learn self-defence or a martial art? I’m planing to do that and know a place where I can do it. However, that still wont be a deterrent to other idiots who possess a little fighting skill, like Chris Chackfield’s killer. It also wont protect you from a gang of people either, especially ones with weapons, or just one person with a gun.

I just feel it’s a lose-lose situation, unless you enjoy prison or being victimised then you’re fucked! The only way I would feel safe and secure outside is if I could carry a gun and wear a bullet/knife proof vest. I’m serious, I don’t feel secure, I know my problems compound that feeling but it’s the way I feel and given the area I live and the filth I know inhabits it, it’s the only way. 

I could keep my mouth shut and head down, bite my lip and let the scum run the area, but if the truth be known I’m getting sick of it! I can be very confrontational and honest, I’ve been avoiding being that way for some time, I don’t like the  stupidity, bullies and pure human filth who think they demand respect. I’m supposed to back off and be subject to their bullshit, just because they don’t care if they don’t go to prison or not? The Community should stand together to fight these people, but they’re so divided and at each others throats where I live that it’s almost impossible. They’re also far too lazy to do anything about it and don’t think it’s that bad anyway.

I feel I’m going to get in to trouble at some point, especially when I start going out again, if I bottle this stuff up and start fretting and getting all anxious over this then I’m going to be back at square one again. Moving out of the area is an option though there’s no guarantee where I live will be that different. Given the service by our current landlords, their other estates wont be much different.

So, does anyone have a… 

                                                                               44.  Magnum Handgun spare?

                                                                               Or maybe a Glock 40 instead?

I think I like the Glock better, more shots and easier reload for the more impatient Human filth and Scally slayer!