Celebrity Culture Is Fucking Rubbish

Some of the stories I’ve seen on the front of these mags amaze me. What amazes me more is the people who will buy such obvious works of fiction and exaggerations. I took time to read a few, and they are utter shit! Lies, unconfirmed stories and shitty pictures of celebrities doing everyday things.

I think people read these types of mags for two reasons:

(1) They literally are halfwits.

(2) They have such boring lives they have to live through someone else’s vicariously.

I wouldn’t really mind but these mags are getting more popular and a sizable chunk of the next generation are going to be  a bunch of celebrity obsessed halfwits who’s only ambition in life is to be pointlessly famous.

I would say people need to pay more attention to their children and spend more time with them and guide them through life to give them self-esteem and thus a grounding in reality. Um, but it isn’t going to happen, these kids are going to grow up as adults and feel like failures because they’re not where they thought they’d be in life. And it’s all due to an unrealistic, distorted media version of life and lazy parents.

The rot is setting in. 

Well, that sums up my feelings on Celebrity worshiping culture Magazines and the type of people who read them. Hope you enjoyed the parody! 

Oh, and for the record, I don’t hate Frankie Boyle. But everyone else in there can get fucked with a rusty knife for all I care.

A Badly Written Blog About Music [UPDATED]

I’ve had a few debates about Music in my own home and on-line, and the usual reply I get for my criticism of nearly all music is:

“Dude! You’re tone deaf!” – Sam

“His vocal range is extensive!” – Sam

“They do not all sound the same!” – Sam

“Not everything has to be about Politics” – Sam

“Only so many sounds you can make!” – Sam

“Olly Murs is great! Fuck off!” – My Sister

“%$T”!* $%&*+£!!! ” – My other sister when I called her dancey chipmunk ‘music’ shite.

“This is real music! And he’s not a Pedophile!” – My Mam on Elvis and my opinion of him.

“Your Music’s shit, too!” – My Brother

“Ewww, no his music’s not crap and he’s not a wanker!” – My sister’s friends reaction to my opinion of 50 Cent.

“His vocal range is extensive!” – Daf

“Not everything is Black and white, Phil” – Daf

“Not everything has to be about Politics and have a message” – Daf

“Only so much you can do with musical instruments before it starts to sound the same” – Daf

“I don’t know, I quite like Las Ketchup!” – Daf

Ok, the last one was made up. But it’s fair to say I’m hostile to a lot of music and nearly all of the people I talk with accuse me of having a narrow, limited musical taste. This is not the case as I like many types of music, such as: Ska, Dance, Rock, Metal, Punk, Digital Hardcore, Electronic, some Blues, Some Pop,  Some Soul and even some Classical.

Having said this, let me explain my position on Music past and present and my problem with it.

My first problem: Lack of originality and constant mimicry! The defence “There’s only so many sounds/vocal ranges/Styles.” is not acceptable. These people who sound (sing) the same do not sound the same by accident, they sound like that because they copy their heroes or the most popular singing/music style of the time. This is very prelivant in the U.S. Punk, Emo, Metal and Pop-Rock generas. They all sing and sound the fucking same! They do! You can’t escape it, it’s a damn fact! (No I’m not tone deaf, if I was I’d not like anything) It’s just a complete and utter lack of originality on their parts, it really is shameful, and they have the bollocks to stand on stage and sing and call themselves ‘different’.

You can say the same for nearly every genere, they all copy what came before and they never move forward, none of them are brave enough to make music that is different, that is not the same, they only make crap that’s safe, so they can live inside the success, fame, notoriety and glory of someone else and try to make money out of it at the same time, if they’re that way inclined. I don’t apply this label to the originators of a certain sound or style, just the talentless wankers that come afterwards copying them.

Second Problem: Image over Music! What a load of shite! Seriously, because you walk around all dressed in black, with make-up, a huge emo quiff, chains, piercings, Poncey expensive haircuts, a telephone in your hair (ppppp-po-ker faaace) etc etc etc… doesn’t make you different. You look like every other cunt who dresses like that and it doesn’t make you ‘different’ or ‘alternative’ and it doesn’t make your music or scene any fucking better than the other side, you’re all a bunch of poser cunts with zero originality between you all! Also, it is NOT art! The same way Tracey Emin’s pissed in bed and manky tampon isn’t! They’re clothes, and the bits that aren’t clothes, are just bits and bobs you like to use to make you look different, well, you aint, you look the same as the other cunts who wear that crap. But if it makes you feel better thinking you’re all that and your music and scene is too, then please, go for it. But please, don’t tell me “It’s a way of life!”, it’s not a way of life, you’re just a cunt!

Lyrics and Meaning: Of course, lyrics don’t have to mean anything, if you write a song that doesn’t mean anything in particular, then you’re just like thousands of others, well done. People will find meaning in what they want, so I don’t really care. It starts to annoy me when people go over the same ground or try to say something cleaver and political, but in a very cryptic way, so they can get away with not having to defend their views. Grow some ballls! Oh, is the record company scared you said the ‘F’ word and you insulted someone you shouldn’t have? Awwww! Fuck you, you spineless twats!

Another thing, record companies dictating what goes and what doesn’t, and many Musicians accept this, way to take a stand and put money above your Music and freedom of speech. You’re an inspiration to us all.

Hedonism: *Boomp, Boomp, Boomp Boomp!* If that night club collapses on you, am tellin ya, you wont be missed!

Love Songs: Types are as follows: ‘I miss ya babe’, ‘I love ya babe’, ‘I want you boy/girl’, You cheated on me boy/girl’, ‘Ya jilted me boy/girl’, ‘Let’s party boy/girl’, ‘I’m depressed boy/girl’, ‘You don’t know I exist boy/girl’, You’re hot and sexy boy/girl’, ‘I don’t love you anymore boy/girl’.  JUST FUCK OFF!

Sex, Drugs and Rock & Roll!: Please! You’re a fucking clesha! Dress like a cunt, act like a cunt, take drugs like a cunt and fuck like a cunt! You think you’re doing anything different? No you aint, though you may catch AIDS/HIV, unlike some of your idols who just died of being hedonistic wankers.

Hip-Hop and Rap: Unmitigated crap! (most of it) The sound isn’t always bad, but the lryics and culture behind it are hollow, sexist, materialistic, ostentatious, Shallow and ingeneral… complete bollocks! Fuck off fiddy!

I’ve annoyed myself with this post now, I pretty much dislike a hell of a lot of music, mostly because it’s generic and been done before. So before anyone asks what I like, I like a few things, the original pieces that were created by musicians with some spine and bollocks to try something different instead of sticking to the tried and tested formula. So I don’t listen to a lot of new Music anymore, just old stuff and one or two modern bands that are at least half original.

UPDATE: MY friend Sam has said my quoting of him callimg me tone deaf isn’t fair without you hearing the evidence yourself. Bear in mind these are vocals we’re listiening to. So here’s the two vocalists that I think sound the same:

Song One:

Song Two:

Wankers Of The Week: Muslim Wanker And More!

Yeh, I been gone again, sorry, been ill, tired and all that Jazz! Happy Belated Christmas and New Year to all! This is regular thing I used to do on here, I was recently reminded about it by a MySpace friend some time last week. So here it goes!

Anjem Choudry

I don’t like to give publicity to dickheads like this so I’ll only say His name once and refer to him as a Pointless Muslim Wanker from now on. The pointless Muslim Wanker is a British Born Muslim, he grew up in a country where he wanted for nothing. He even made like the natives and drank, smoke and fucked his way through Uni. The above picture is not a Photoshop, besides the words. This man is like many Muslims in the West, he enjoys what the West has to offer untill a combination of his restrictive backward religion, family, tradition and religious leaders kick in and makes him guilt ridden at what he’s done. Then He turns on the West for corrupting him, then wants to apply his stone age man-made rubbish to everyone else!

I just noticed too, I spelled Infidel wrong! Don’t start picking at it as a valid argument because everyone knows nit-picking about spelling in a debate is the last resort of someone with NO argument!

This Muslim Tommy Tanker is planning to carry empty coffins through the English village of Wootton Basset, the same Village dead British servicemen drive through on their way to their burials else where in the country. Obviously this is to create mass hatred of all Muslims to kick off some kind of social war in the UK. But he say’s it’s a legit protest against the war in Iraq and Afghanistan perpetrated by the oppressive West (can someone show me a Muslim part of the world that ISN’T oppressive?) and the Muslims who’ve died there. I take it that the non-Muslim Iraqis and such don’t matter?

Everyone is tits up and arse backwards over this idea! It shouldn’t happen and is going to be stopped and all that shit. Fact is this idiot hasn’t even applied for permission to hold the march! Again the reaction to this by the British population and the media is understandable, but, should not be blown out of all proportion and splashed all over the news like the BNP (Nazis) where when they were on Question Time last year. It will only work in this vile little bastard’s advantage and garnish attention for any causes he’s connected to. These people never learn!

I think he should be allowed to protest like everyone else, even if his motives are twisted. After all if you deny him his right to protest are we not just like the Human scum he is and who currently run the middle east? With a bit of luck a riot will ensue and this sad wanker and his mates will get their arses kicked. Bring on the social war, sooner rather than later I say!

Hoon And Hewitt’s Failed Coup 

What a pair of idiots! When I heard about this I was shocked, then I laughed! I laughed because what they did was completely pointless and stupid, why try to oust the Prime Minster when you’re rising in the opinion polls and people were forgetting what a boring bastard Gordon Brown actually is?

I think they weren’t acting alone, unless they were acting out of spite because both Hoon and Hewitt were over looked for EU jobs? They don’t have the balls to act alone, they’re both failed Minsters. Then today David Miliband, The Secretary of State, was implicated in the plot, which would make sense! He’s tried three times to be PM and this could be his last chance. When asked about the coup he didn’t really state any support for anyone! LOL! What a turnip!

 

Whether he did it or not doesn’t matter now because he dithered on placing his support which means he’s out of favour with Brown. Not only that, Brown will kick him out of the Cabinet if he wins the next election. Epic Wankers, all of them, for putting their personal positions and petty revenge ahead of running the country like they were elected to do! Just further proof these people don’t give a shit about the people because they have just damaged their Party’s chance of wining the next election. And if the Tories win, well… watch the shit hit the fan because they aint got a clue or solid policy on anything!

More Celebrity TV Bollocks.

I aint posting pictures nor am I naming this programme! I don’t want give it any publicity. If you live in the UK you’ll know what I’m talking about, if you don’t then the name of the Programme is the same as the non-existent character in 1984 that’s watching everywhere Just another group of sad tossers craving attention, low on money or publicising something! They’re such an embarrassment to the Human race and themselves! I’m glad this shows died in the UK now because less than 2 million watch it on average these days! I say crash a plane full of celebs on the place and kill them all at once!

Shite Music.

I’ve no idea who this stupid women is, she sounds like she’s about 16. The first line of her song involves waking up like P-Diddy, I assume she means Black and an ostentatious wanker, and then brushes her teeth with a bottle of Jack Daniels? I heard this song on the TV a few times because my sisters are at the age for Pop music! The song is just complete and utter rubbish! She sings about hedonistic shite, she sounds like such a wannabe rock star like the rest of the teen stars being sold to children as good music and fun! That way of life aint that great, take a look at a lot of the former Rock stars alive and dead! They aint looking so good. There’s more to music and life than getting pissed and waking up the next day not knowing what you did and who you fucked or who fucked you!

I’ll have to a full blog on Music soon!

U.S. Pop Star and Shite British Comedian get engaged. I don’t care! Why is that even news? Who buys these papers based on the fact they’re in it? If you do you’re a fucking idiot and deserve to lose your oxygen privileges!

I can’t think of anymore because I usually avoid shite when it comes on the TV or I turn the page in the news paper. I may have to start reading more shit!